2. Constructive Criticism Slays You
Does constructive criticism exist? People are not perfect. There is no doubt about that. But, is there a way to point out a person’s faults without damaging their self-esteem? Does it depend on the motives of the accuser, the character of the accused or is it a combination of the two?
Consider an average day with an average person. If one were to point out a fault or mention a trait of that person, they might feel hurt, but they will probably do one of two things. They will either refute the claim entirely or they will refuse to acknowledge the opinion of the accuser and go about their day. One other option is to consider the claim made and work on the deficit in character they have pointed out.
Obviously, you need to consider the source of the claim when listening to criticism. But, if you act according to the second scenario, you probably have a strong, yet changeable character. You can take criticism in context and in stride. But a person with high-functioning anxiety doesn’t behave in either of these ways. When someone points out something about them, it could be as innocuous as saying they are not looking their best.
A person suffering from high anxiety will internalize this fully. They will take this passing opinion as absolute fact. To them, the accuser may as well be an expert in the field. This kind of internalization is partly due to inherent insecurities.
But it is also because their anxiety is now exposed. It is no longer hidden, they have been laid bare and vulnerable. Which in turn, produces more anxiety. It is a non-stop spiral downward.