18. LBJ and His Beloved Jumbo
Lyndon Johnson seriously skeeved many around him with his nutty fixation on his manhood. In what amounted to an alpha male ritual of primacy assertion, LBJ had his aides, both male and female, take dictation as they stood in the doorway of his office bathroom, while he did his business on the toilet. Even on the floors of the House or Senate, Johnson would extravagantly grab his crotch, and frequently reach through his pocket to better position “Jumbo”, so its outline could show beneath his pants.
LBJ constantly tried to work his “size” into conversations. E.g.; in a recorded phone call with his tailor, Johnson said: “Another thing, the crotch, down where your nu*s hang – it’s always a little too tight. So when you make them up, gimme an inch that I can let out there“. He also had a special nozzle installed in his White House bathroom, to shoot water at his privates while he showered. When White House staff objected that it would require a great deal of plumbing work, Johnson steamrolled over their complaints, and told them: “If I can move 10,000 troops in a day, you can certainly fix the bathroom any way I want it“.