8. Leo Tolstoy Had it All (Theoretically) but “Fancied” Suicide More than Anything
Tolstoy’s novels brought him an enormous amount of money that could guarantee him all pleasures of life. He had a beautiful wife through whom he got thirteen children. However, in his later writings, he distanced himself from realism as an aesthetic goal. Tormented between a strict religious temperament and his sensual cravings, Tolstoy came to embrace a life of personal austerity based on Christian love and an idealized image of the Russian peasantry. It is believed that he suffered from very severe, suicidal, major depression that often manifested in the emotional intensity of his novels.
In his book titled A Confession, Tolstoy wrote about his inner struggle to find the meaning of his life. Through this book, he explained why he decided to bury himself in his work in order to avoid facing the deeper questions of life. But the more he tried to avoid, the more problems began to torture him. As time marched on, his bouts of depression grew more frequent and more intense, where it came to a point that the famous author believed that only death could save him from the smothering, sad reality he experienced.